When the real me comes out of the closet

Last night was amazing, but let’s start from the beginning. A Lesbian friend of mine told me (on Monday) that she has an extra ticket to go watch the Spain vs Portugal game last night and wanted to know if I wanted to go with.

HELLLL YEAH!!!! To have the full experience we took the train (cape-metro-rail) to Cape Town. Since we had tickets to the game we did not need to pay for train tickets. Arriving at Cape Town station we were amazed by how much they have improved it. We decided

to do the fan walk to get into the spirit since we arrived at the station at 17:45 and the game was only starting at 20:30. It really got us into things. There were people playing drums and dancing and walking on stilts… It was amazing. Vuvuzelas were being blown everywhere including ours. We even made the newspapers: Here we are pic4!

Going into the first gates of the stadium one realises the ginormaty of the Green Point stadium. It really is quite beautiful. We went to the little fan park thingy where they have these huge balls you could write on. So we totally did (thank god I forgot the permanent marker from the lab in my pocket). Went into the stadium early to find our seats, which was actually quite easy to find. It was awesome seats. Second tear, middle row, just off to the right of the one goal post.

I sent out a image of where I am to a few people including 14 who I thought might be working that night. He is a volunteer for FIFA, doing some IT&T stuff. So I told him where I am sitting and he came to say hello. Also video called the parental unit to show them how the stadium looks from where I was sitting.

Just before the game I had to take a leak, so I followed the signs to where they say the boy’s playground is. It was one huge room walls on both my right and left were long urinals. And the wall joining the two were cubicles. The other wall were the stairs going up to the stadium again. I must say it is not easy for me to pee with approximately 20 people standing either side of you.

The game was amazing, the beers were really expensive though and totally American (Budweiser). But we enjoyed ourselves. There was a family sitting in front of us with 2 kids. A boy and a girl. The girl was probably about 6 or 7 the boy 7 or 8. The girl kept putting her fingers in her ears to block out the vuvuzelas, so I gave her my noise dimmers (we were probably making the most noise anyway, hehe). Afterward we went to the waterfront Spur had a meal and came home to Stellies. It was so much fun!

Earlier that day and again that evening (after the game) MrBig and I had a bit of a falling out. But all is okay again. I don’t like having fallouts with people, but I think it is a good way to learn where your relationship is and how the person reacts to conflict. MrBig handled himself well. Hope he feels the same way. I also understand why he was a bit edgy. He is moving to a new place and it is very stressful.

Another thing I have noted was that he gets a bit scared when I hang out with my gay friends. Now this sort of leads to a problem, because about 80-90% of my friends are gay. I understand why he feels threatened, he has been hurt in previous relationships, but I hope that he will soon realise that if I am with a guy, I am with only that guy. Only time will tell…

Well since I now have my own website I should probably post a little more. So here goes…

A lot has happened since my last post. 14 and I are friends. He promised to go running with me but have not been able to till now. He has either had to work or have been sick till now (or both). But I think we are friends.

The weekend of the 10^th I was in Mossel Bay for a friend’s (Nurse’s) wedding. It was a lot of fun. Danced all night, had a bit of wine and smoked way too much. Also saw Fur-Face his wife and LittleJ. They are doing good. He is as usual, working his ass off. LittleJ is getting so big and he really has a voice on him. He is the cutest thing. His teeth are just coming out so he was a bit agitated, but I still got a smile out of him for this photo.

For the last 3 or so weeks I have been jogging. So far, except for one time, I have been able to jog my old rout of 3km without a rest walk. Only got stitch once and that was my own fault. I think I am now able to up the game a bit, but I am not sure how. At the moment I am only jogging twice a week and doing the 3k’s so should I first up the amount of times a week I jog or up the distance, and if I increase the distance by how much. That is ‘course if I don’t fall my ass off. oh here is my rout at the moment http://crum.pl/d61s

OH here is some interesting news, S.Mxit is engaged! Yes you read that right. I’m not exactly sure when he started dating this guy but he only got engaged this month. I guess he found the right guy.

Any way. Let me know what you guys are thinking. Leave me a comment!

Last time I bloged I told you a little about cute 14. The boy who read my blog fromt to back and probably knows it better than I do because of it (some of those posts I haven’t read since I posted them). Well after spotting this cute thing at a Lesbigay party, I took a bit of interest in him, but didn’t think anything of it since he is young and a bit out of my league. Apparently the guy also took a bit of an interest in my and started the normal gay ritual of e-stalking, thus finding out all he can from the net about me and with my internet profile it is not to difficult. That is also how he got to my blog. After reading my blog he took an even bigger interest in me and decided to ask me out on a date. I got the invite right after the Kelly concert and said that I would like to go on this date with him. Of course I was scared shitless, here is a 18year old guy with the balls to ask out a 24 year old guy on a date. So over the Loki induced weekend we chatted on gtalk and mxit. The more we chatted the more excited I got about this date of ours. The closer it came to the day of the date the more giggly I got. I was like a 16 year old girl being asked to go to a matric farewell.

The day before the date I randomly met him and his one friend after invigilating a test. They really wanted to see the Lab, so I took them to the department and gave them the grand tour. Not much to see but hey…

On the night of the date (Wednesday) I went home early to get ready and to start the full gay grooming ritual. He PICKED ME UP!!! Yes, after having a bf for 2 months that I had to drive after, it felt nice being driven to a date (not that S.Mxit and I ever went on dates). The whole date went well, he told me that a reason he asked me on the date was because of what he had read on this blog and that he also felt like he can get/have sex any time with whom ever, but that he wanted a realtionship. I was falling for this guy hard. I slept over but nothing happened, well not much. I struggled to fall asleep. I guess I am still not used to sleeping next to someone. Though I must say it felt so nice holding someone and being held by someone again (and the fact that he has such a nice bed!!). Any who, the next morning he took me home and I was on such a high!! He was a bit strange on the online, but I just though it’s because he did not get enough sleep.

For the next 2 days I sms’s him a few times and I think I might have smothered him a bit like I always do with people. On Friday evening before his test I sms’d him asking when can we see each other again an if he was up to watching a movie on Tuesday or might want to meet up on Sunday, when I got a sms saying: “ill let you know, ok? I need to do some thinking”, my face dropped. I knew exactly what was coming. I asked him if I was smothering him and he replied that it was not that and that he know he said that it is what he wanted, but that commitment was a bit daunting right now and that he does not think that he would be able to give his all in a relationship at this time, and that it might be easier if we were friends and take things from there. Though disappointed, I do understand, he is still very young and even though neither of us really wanted age to be a issue I think it might be. Not the fact that there is a few years difference between us, but that he is at the age where he should be exploring all he can, not be stuck in a relationship with a 24 year old guy who is (hopefully) in his final year of varsity and had his varsity scores.

I think I was on a bit of an emotional high when He told me he needs time to think so I think coming down from that high was a bit of a crash and burn situation. I told him that I would really still like to be friends with him and we agreed that we would be. So if I can be friends with someone like Mr. P then I can just as “easily” be friends with 14. He said that it went well with the test on Friday but not so well with his test on Saturday. I’m trying to give him some breathing room for now. Will give you an update later. Wonder if he will still go jogging with me? Should I even ask him? Though I guess he might read this blog… Any thoughts?